03-27-2016, 12:06 AM
Thanks, both. I'll stipulate that posting it the day after it was written left many rough spots.
@RiverNotch - thanks for the serious critique of such light verses. My reading (writing?) is that the closing stanzas shouldn't disappoint because the opening stanzas are less profound than you found them. On the other hand, I take political philosophy pretty seriously.
As you noted, it's rough; just looking over it again, I see where the first "anarchy" could change to "violence," avoiding repetition; with enough such nips and tucks, it might pass.
(In the States, there are many places where an innkeeper is not only forbidden to let patrons smoke, but forbidden to smoke, himself - in his own domicile and place of business! If anything, tobacco smoking is more persecuted than pot smoking since the same claque which disdains the former indulges in the latter... somewhat the way those who at least affect to abhor pederasty are more than comfortable with abortion. Yada vice, yada virtue - it's the way of the world. Another reason it's better to be ruled my dead men - even though white and male - rather than live people, though they be ever so rainbow-hued and multi-gendered: it's the difference between the vaunted rule of law and the much-feared rule of [living] men.)
@RiverNotch - thanks for the serious critique of such light verses. My reading (writing?) is that the closing stanzas shouldn't disappoint because the opening stanzas are less profound than you found them. On the other hand, I take political philosophy pretty seriously.
As you noted, it's rough; just looking over it again, I see where the first "anarchy" could change to "violence," avoiding repetition; with enough such nips and tucks, it might pass.
(In the States, there are many places where an innkeeper is not only forbidden to let patrons smoke, but forbidden to smoke, himself - in his own domicile and place of business! If anything, tobacco smoking is more persecuted than pot smoking since the same claque which disdains the former indulges in the latter... somewhat the way those who at least affect to abhor pederasty are more than comfortable with abortion. Yada vice, yada virtue - it's the way of the world. Another reason it's better to be ruled my dead men - even though white and male - rather than live people, though they be ever so rainbow-hued and multi-gendered: it's the difference between the vaunted rule of law and the much-feared rule of [living] men.)
Non-practicing atheist