03-25-2016, 08:36 AM
Hi DC,
I cannot add much to what others have already said; however in reading your piece it does seem that you were rushing the lines. I mean they seem like they were born out of real emotion, you should let your pen catch up to your heart.
Thanks, Matt
I cannot add much to what others have already said; however in reading your piece it does seem that you were rushing the lines. I mean they seem like they were born out of real emotion, you should let your pen catch up to your heart.
Thanks, Matt
(03-18-2016, 09:59 AM)DC Black Wrote: I'm leaving us my love,
my reckless entanglement,
my fucking mad, headlong descent
into today.
You swore we'd die entwined
in each other,
loving each other.
Give me a chance you said,
to prove my love, you said.
Ha! you had me there,
I didn't ever see this coming,
This cold, this freezing cold,
I'd have taken hatred any day.
Didn't I deserve that,
at least that?
Didn't I, my love?