It's True, The Earth Is Flat edit 1 (Tiger, Tom, Achebe)

[ellajam]

Thanks so much for all your comments.

@JM
Thanks for taking the time to read and comment, and for the camaraderie.

@ Hes
Hey, great to see you crit. Thanks so much for your support of the form, I enjoy it. I appreciate your interesting comments on S1, I'm wondering how you feel about the "the" before supple skin. I like the detachment it brings but the sonics don't thrill me. Thanks for pointing out the weak lines in S2, you are not alone. I tend to be a slave to meter even when it may not benefit the poem but even sticking with it I'm sure I can do better. Love the comment on scheming/screaming. Much appreciate the time you took with this.

@Tom
Thanks for returning and explaining further. The double again would take care of that bit of inversion and make sense for the poem, but I just can't get over thinking of it as lazy, , I know, it's hard for me to move past rules. Great justification for adding Yin, I'm just not sure I want to go there, still thinking. Thanks so much for your help.

@ephemerald
Hi, welcome to the Pen. I'm so glad you stopped in to read and comment. Thank you for your support of the poem's middle. I love to write in sentence that goes on almost too long, others may feel it went past its limit but I'm glad it had the desired effect for you, I appreciate the time you took to let me know. I hope you enjoy the site.