At the needle exchange

[Cathleen]

Hi mark,
Just wanted to say how much I like the premise and tone of this one.  i think you have done a good job with offsetting the humorous twist of the pov against the underlying seriousness of the  illness.
i particularly like the way that you have blended the medical images and terms / names with the slag names to give a picture of a place where clinical / meets  civilian/ meets street life

The last stanza sealed the deal for me in terms of the whole working for me.
My only nit was I did not really get the need for the question marks and then the opener I ask - felt like this should be past tense I asked.  (as I read the previous stanza as in [you gave me]  Steri-wipes, ci-tric, fil-ters ...  [so that in my read the end punctuation was ??? or even !!!]
sorry making a hash of explaining my thoughts here.  (long day yesterday and up early to finish a large concreting job...talking of which gtg and float my concrete !!)

AJ.

At the needle exchange
I am enigmatic.
A cipher on a pedestal,
they riddle me with bullets.

Steri-Wipes?
Ci-tric?
Fil-ters?

I ask for pins and sin bins,
whilst watching angelic hands
struggle with a silencer.
As they reload
I tell them about my friend.

A simple lie would gain their respect.

I tell the truth.

My words are met rhythmically
with six muffled gunshots,
"A - di - a - bet - ic - dog."



Note:
Pins is slang for needles/hypodermic syringes.
Sin bin is slang for a container for used needles.

Hi,
I thought it flowed well and it was quite clear what was happening with the questions.
I personally would stick with 'I ask for' - something wonderfully blunt in the description of this transaction.