California - Edit 1

[REW]

Revised:

While evening sways the almond grove
and palm tree dates bloom on the beach,
my grandma slaves over the stove
to serve a simple family feast.

Mom leads us in a quiet grace
that lasts so long my stomach growls,
then once we’re blessed I stuff my face
as dad and grandpa smile and howl.

Original:

While evening sways the almond grove
and palm tree dates bloom on the beach,
your grandma slaves over the stove
to make a pie from summer peach.

Yes you fixed the peach issue/forced rhyme.  As for your second stanza, I feel it could be built up more, as in the poem.  I still do not see the defining California moment.

Your last line to me leaves me with questions...it seems to me that perhaps you should mention why Grandpa and Dad smile and howl.  Or is this when they transform into werewolves?

I guess I am expecting a special moment that characterizes why you chose to call this California.