A Cure for a Stammer edit 0.1keith,tiger

[Keith]

How do you come up with these ideas, I found the stammers rather frustrating to read but it does work within the lines I'm just not sure of the poems basis. I don't want to sound foolish or a smart arse but here goes. If this is a recollection then why is the N stammering especially in S1 and S2, surley it should start in S3 when the reader is place at the scene of the crimes against the N as such as it is. I must say the meter is spot on and its really not easy to tell a story so well as this. I have put some other comments for your consideration.
Best Keith

I thuh-thuh thought that I would sleep, but no.
I muh-muh must have been awake all night.
I'm sure I'm happy  nuh-nuh now but know
that wuh-wuh what I done just wasn't right. I'm hooked I want to know what he did.

I nuh-nuh know what people think of me.
For fuh-fuck's sake try walkin' in my shoes.
I hated kids way buh-buh back but we The phrasing here feels off as though it is structured to catch the ryhme
were all kids then,  though that ain't no excuse.

The guh-guh girls, I saw them look  away:
and  from  behind their ears went up, a sign This is a nice observation I like the detail
that they were pullin' faces so I'd say
fuh-fuh fuck you bitch, and  lose face every time. Girls to bitches ?

Except just once, her name was Clementine. Like how you catch the rhyme from S3
She had a kinda tick that made her twitch.
The other girls would ask  her for the time
then luh-luh laugh n' call her Wind-up Witch.

We tuh-tuh talked most evenin's walkin' back.
She tuh-tuh twitched, I stammered, but  we grinned.
The other kids would gather like a pack
and chant our names like we had somehow sinned. You got me, happy the N has found a soul mate

One day I kissed her rough on thuh-the mouth.
I guess I thought I loved her...but she cried.
She ruh-ruh ran away back to her house
and told her puh-puh pah.Shit, how she lied. This cuts deep given th N plight

And thuh-thuh that was when I up't an' went;
I luh-luh left a note for Wind-Up Witch.
The cops let loose the dogs, they got my scent,
and fuh-fuh found me hidin' in a ditch.

I never got the chance to tell my side.
I tried buh-but the words just wouldn't come.
The judge, she said that all along I'd lied;
that I'd turn out to be a no good bum. I like how the story is unraveling

She told me just one chance was all I'd get;
three months  in cuh-correction was my due.
Inside, I got the dirt from guys I met;
when I got out...I knew what I must do.

So here I stand with smokin' gun in hand.
They laughed at me but they're not laughing now.
I guess that now, at last, they understand.
My stammer's gone.Listen...listen...wow! Neat ending in a weird psycho kind of way
1tectak2016