02-07-2016, 06:37 AM
Hi Julius, lovely little poem. The day I realised I'd never have to change a nappy again was one of the happiest of my life 
I wonder if you might just re-think the last line? It's not terribly strong. It might involve rewording the last line of the preceding verse.
Otherwise, the few little hiccups can be smoothed over by reading aloud. Nicely done.
I wonder if you might just re-think the last line? It's not terribly strong. It might involve rewording the last line of the preceding verse.
Otherwise, the few little hiccups can be smoothed over by reading aloud. Nicely done.