02-02-2016, 07:50 AM
Thanks for the feedback.
Billy, I wondered on that spot (l3) too; ending/punctuating it would also address at least part of the point Erthona brought up. Going to have play with it and see what sticks.
Ellajam: "guided" was the word I was stuck on the most, it wasn't what I wanted but I was struggling a bit with a substitute that didn't turn into another line or a cliche. Hopefully, as I tinker one will come to me ;-)
Erthona: Yep. Funny thing is, I often make the same point, and then, sipping my hypocrisy on the rocks, do it myself.
Billy, I wondered on that spot (l3) too; ending/punctuating it would also address at least part of the point Erthona brought up. Going to have play with it and see what sticks.
Ellajam: "guided" was the word I was stuck on the most, it wasn't what I wanted but I was struggling a bit with a substitute that didn't turn into another line or a cliche. Hopefully, as I tinker one will come to me ;-)
Erthona: Yep. Funny thing is, I often make the same point, and then, sipping my hypocrisy on the rocks, do it myself.