01-13-2016, 04:18 AM
Thanks for the reply Dale, when I wrote this critique I seemed to be changing my mind so many times over certain aspects and at one point there was a danger that I was going to scrap the whole thing. In the end I kind of forced myself to finish it then press the 'Send Reply' button so that I didn't have a chance to change my mind. So to be honest I wasn't sure what you would make of my somewhat self indulgent analysis/critique...
I really liked the use of wordplay and playing with sounds which is strange because now after reading your Hunter S. 'top sun' explanation; I realised that I didn't actually read the poem out loud. It is a crime that I'm guilty of too many times, had I done so I'm sure I would have got the Hunter S. thing.
A couple of other things... I seemed to have found euphemisms too easily when they weren't implied. Although I do think that this may be partly a cultural thing at times. "Limp wristed", seemed straight forward for me at the time, but I think that it is probably more used by British people, not particularly as a saying but an actual physical action. Also, I've never seen footage of Ginsberg (except briefly in the background of a Dylan music video) to know that he had such mannerisms... It makes sense now.
My knowledge on the phrase 'Jelly-Roll' is from blues music, but probably like lots of phrases that come from 'Blues' culture their meaning isn't exactly the same now as it was originally. Perhaps it is time that I re-wrote the 'Blues Dictionary'.
As for coffee?? When has coffee ever meant coffee?
In a coffee shop most probably.
Thanks again for the reply and also, just in case you need it, this is the link to post of your poem that you originally posted last February http://www.pigpenpoetry.com/thread-16621...#pid185081
Mark
I really liked the use of wordplay and playing with sounds which is strange because now after reading your Hunter S. 'top sun' explanation; I realised that I didn't actually read the poem out loud. It is a crime that I'm guilty of too many times, had I done so I'm sure I would have got the Hunter S. thing.
A couple of other things... I seemed to have found euphemisms too easily when they weren't implied. Although I do think that this may be partly a cultural thing at times. "Limp wristed", seemed straight forward for me at the time, but I think that it is probably more used by British people, not particularly as a saying but an actual physical action. Also, I've never seen footage of Ginsberg (except briefly in the background of a Dylan music video) to know that he had such mannerisms... It makes sense now.
My knowledge on the phrase 'Jelly-Roll' is from blues music, but probably like lots of phrases that come from 'Blues' culture their meaning isn't exactly the same now as it was originally. Perhaps it is time that I re-wrote the 'Blues Dictionary'.
As for coffee?? When has coffee ever meant coffee?
In a coffee shop most probably.Thanks again for the reply and also, just in case you need it, this is the link to post of your poem that you originally posted last February http://www.pigpenpoetry.com/thread-16621...#pid185081
Mark
wae aye man ye radgie