The Siege (rev 2)

[ellajam]

I think the edit works beautifully. Some notes below.

Revision 1:

Bound by right-angles,
hydrangeas blind the window-frame
to the bitter clot of light
L1 makes perfect sense now and the image is clear. I like the light moved up.

over wrought iron chairs
perched like insects
beneath constellations
of coffee stains. Again, a much clearer image for me.
The red eyed frenzy
of the night fast

imploding
in steam and speed:
beleaguered

soldiers boiling
oil for the castle walls.
Sorry, it still doesn't lead me here, maybe if the title already had me thinking barista, but as is, still nothing.

Original:

Right-angled
hydrangeas blind
the windowframe

to the bitter
rotten clot
of light

over wrought
iron chairs perched
like insects

beneath
constellations
of coffee stains

while the red
eyed frenzy
of the night fast

implodes
in steam and speed:
beleaguered

soldiers boiling
oil for the castle
walls.

I'm looking forward to hearing if others can get the ending. Nice work here.