The Destination

[REW]

Hello and welcome to the pen

Revision of Revision #3


Under the arch of brow

unless "the arch of brow" is a famous arch (in which case it should be capitalized) this is just a pretentious way of saying "under the brow's arch".

is a world of geometry:
within the heated expanding center
passions,

"is a world of geometry" is good
"within the heated expanding center passions" is overmodified crap. It barely reads like English anymore.

through the pigmented light
a soul,
in the focus
intellectual curiosity;
the beam,
love warm and illuminating.

So, all the prepositions throughout here lend a clumsy, clunky, wandering to the piece. Within - through - in - there needs to be a focus.
"Pigmented" is an odd modifier in that it adds absolutely no clarity to your noun.  What does pigmented light look like?  Haven't a clue.
You have abandoned all the rules of English grammar throughout here which I have been told is ok in poetry, but to what purpose? If you are writing in English, I would like to be able to parse the meaning in English as well.  A verb would be nice as a starter.

 
You guide me so that I
may find my way home:
delighted in ovals, lost circles,
sad to ever see a crescent leak a tear.

you don't need both "so" and "that", either will do.
"ever" adds nothing.

Overall, it feels rough.  The geometry metaphor is both strong and interesting.

Thanks for posting.
Good luck

Yes Milo I took out those empty words.  Thank you.  And I am going to give this one a rest now  and explore the site more until some inspiration strikes.