The Gift Of The Empty Hand (edit #3)

[ellajam]

Hey Ella. I like edit#2 best, so I'll comment on that. First off I like the more deliberate word choices: salvage/deluge/harbor/rescued all lead to the ocean. Keep them.

I'm not sure about the "annotated testaments" line. I liked "each with one article you couldn't trash." better. Just my taste. I liked "article".

Lastly, for now, where did "surge" come from? I preferred the ocean personified. It sounded much bigger without the surge. 

Paul

Thanks, Paul, so kind of you to hang in there with me. I had "testaments in languages" which reads okay but then I just found "annotated testaments" so much fun to say I threw it in there.   Do you think testaments is a good replacement for religious tombs and just annotated is off or they both stink? The article line is still up in the air, thanks for stating your view again.

Surge: I put it in for balance as the lines started developing meter, I think I'll edit it out now. Again, many thanks