12-20-2015, 09:35 AM
I really like the first two stanzas because of their melodic quality. I'm a sucker for rhyme, and I like how the hard A in 'display' is echoed in 'flame.'
I am confused by the last two lines. I am still trying to figure out what they are trying to convey.
I am confused by the last two lines. I am still trying to figure out what they are trying to convey.
(12-16-2015, 07:53 PM)Weeded Wrote: Edit 2
In her palm she held fire
so bright; searing light on display
so all could see,
but none could touch.
He, entranced by her energy,
tried to touch her incandescent flame.
In his hand he held water,
free-flowing and unconstrained.
Curiously, she gave her hand. Confused,
her brightness diminished.
She grew like a star, like a supernova
until finally, she exploded.
he without form
She without form

