Signs

[shemthepenman]

Rogo,
Thanks for the feedback, you bring up a good point about L5. I worked in an edit on L8 but im thinking its going to need another edit to apply your suggestions, and yes I completely agree with you on L11/12, I almost deleted it when I first wrote it because it didnt quite seem to fit with the rest of the poem. And I do kinda feel like the girl is more significant in this piece, its more about her while the guy is more of a mechanical part to the piece. Anyway, thanks for the thoughts, I'll meditate on how to include them on the next edit.
Mike

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Billy,
You are most certainly, in fact, a pervert. Lol just kidding
After reading your comments I now see this in a completely sexual context, thanks lmao.
The title is meant to allude to astrology, this is(supposed to be) about a relationship between a lady with a fire sign, and a man with a water sign, NOT sex :'D
Funny you dont like the 'entranced/incandescent' lines; I was getting frustrated and resorted to opening up a thesaurus and thought "hmm I've never used these words before " I'll work on it, thanks!
Mike

that is funny, i genuinely thought this was intentionally about sex.