Stark Contrast (was Stark) rev #4.

[Weeded]

[comment:  it's been a long while.  Please be gentle but I know I need the feedback]

The bright black pavement bakes back silent heat,
Pulling reluctant drops of sweat
Which drip impotently down,
Drying and leaving its salt on the ground.

The sun has left dried pathos --
The remains of a worm, now a hollow brown
Stick between paving stones;  glued
To the pavement by its desiccated mucous.

Rare, humid winds sometimes move toasted
Pine needles in the sandy lot, the roasting
Heat only stirred.  Everything
Is an afterimage of itself, radiantly shining.

Nothing happens.  The motel fronts heavily
Curtained windows, colored in burnt umber 
With oranges.  The window unit wearily
Labors in the darkened musty room.

A low low buzz, more sensed illusion than real 
Leads around the corner, and in the brush is revealed
The cicadas singing their coarse sibilant song
Defiantly hopeful, gathering around the hidden pond.

The light blue of the spring strikes you first,
A shimmering clear decal stuck here against
Expectations;  negating the starke thirst
of the sand.  Plants, trees hide along the banks.

Although just a small boil, its shoulders
Define the relief of its banks well.  Sand
Dances in the water so much colder
Than expected, tickling your hand.

There is a depth here you can just barely sense, 
But cannot see or measure.
It comes upward while it connects
To and from the greater whole.

Ok so I originally started on a line by line but I noticed my responses were growing redundant so I abandoned it. Basically I feel like this is prose with line breaks. I dont really see much connection between stanzas, and if I do I wonder how necessary the lengths you went to in order to make the connections are. For example, S1 and S2's connection is the temperature, but what I wonder is do you really need two stanzas to describe how hot it is? One could argue you can rework the first 2 stanzas into two or three lines; don't get me wrong its fine imagery, but I almost feel like every stanza in this poem could be the start to its own poem. I'm also left in bewilderment at the end, not sure what to take from this piece as a whole. I enjoyed the imagery, but maybe break it down and provide a better sense of direction/intention. Thanks for sharing,
Mike