EDIT 2: On Falling In

[Magpie]

The way that I'm reading it is as a kind of literary spaghettification as each stanza is gradually sucked into the singularity. It's an interesting idea that I think could work. However the clues as to what is happening also seem to be partly the faults of the poem, such as repetition. I know now afterwards why there is repetition in the poem but at the time it was quite distracting. I think you could lose some of the repetition and still convey the idea.

Swirling green fields gather butterflies and flowers
forming a trail toward an old country cottage covered in green - You could lose green here.
moss and weathered cedar soaking up the sunshine
given by the last of summers warming rays. - I like the length of this first stanza, you could consider losing 'the sunshine given by'

Green grass chases the silhouette - Don't need 'green' here again
of a country home's shadow
as the fading sun sets
below summers horizon. - could possibly lose 'summers' here and even possibly have 'the eventful horizon' which would tie in with the black hole metaphor

Greenery surrounds walls
of a broken home
as sunlight recedes.

Earthen tones reach out to grasp
unnatural shapes falling into
perpetual darkness.  

Darkness meets light
as shapes soften.

A Light
and a Dark. Darkness|
light.

singularity

It is an interesting idea and it would be interesting to see you try and make it work.

Cheers for the read,
Mark