11-10-2015, 12:43 PM
only posts placed in the serious, mild and novice forum go towards you 3 post counts./mod
I like when it went to a new subject you used titles basically to make it more interesting, like the terms relax, climax etc
It made it more better and made it more edged into my head
I like how you made it seem like it wasn't a dream with the term "relax" until the shadowy figure appeared and ended with "awaken" which was great how you did that.
I don't know what you should work on but I guess you could try different techniques like starting from the end of the story and finishing at the start or something like that but on all that, great poem!
I like when it went to a new subject you used titles basically to make it more interesting, like the terms relax, climax etc
It made it more better and made it more edged into my head
I like how you made it seem like it wasn't a dream with the term "relax" until the shadowy figure appeared and ended with "awaken" which was great how you did that.
I don't know what you should work on but I guess you could try different techniques like starting from the end of the story and finishing at the start or something like that but on all that, great poem!