10-28-2015, 11:27 AM
Thanks to all for the great comments and feedback. I've been reflecting on what I was trying to achieve with the poem.
I was trying to create a dynamic tension in the words, leaving this for the reader to resolve in their own mind (hence the contradictory elements). In a weird way I'm quite influenced by cryptic crossword puzzles and I love the idea of gradually unlocking layers of meaning inside a phrase.
Maybe trying to do this in poem form is a bit crazy buy, hey, that's just another meta-puzzle for me to solve!
The feedback helped me see some aspects that are getting in the way:
- the title didn't frame the rest of the puzzle and so just created more confusion
- some of the lines didn't connect enough to give readers a reason to care about looking for the layers
I'll return to my particle collider to construct my next experiment!
I was trying to create a dynamic tension in the words, leaving this for the reader to resolve in their own mind (hence the contradictory elements). In a weird way I'm quite influenced by cryptic crossword puzzles and I love the idea of gradually unlocking layers of meaning inside a phrase.
Maybe trying to do this in poem form is a bit crazy buy, hey, that's just another meta-puzzle for me to solve!
The feedback helped me see some aspects that are getting in the way:
- the title didn't frame the rest of the puzzle and so just created more confusion
- some of the lines didn't connect enough to give readers a reason to care about looking for the layers
I'll return to my particle collider to construct my next experiment!