10-07-2015, 04:45 PM
not sure breaking it into it's constituent parts helped much, a suggestion would be;
communion of megalo
maniacs with cameras poised.
the last two lines felt forced and unnecessary. other than that i enjoyed the poem. i like how self is used but not selfie/s
communion of megalo
maniacs with cameras poised.
the last two lines felt forced and unnecessary. other than that i enjoyed the poem. i like how self is used but not selfie/s
(10-07-2015, 01:32 PM)calypist Wrote: Defining life
This self-absorbed
and dispossessed
communion of
me
ga
lo
ma
ni
acs
with cameras poised
like bayonets
to placidly
impale themselves
Do so, but do so nonetheless,
and thus die happy in the end.
-MR-
I was experimenting with Megalomaniacs... I'm not sure how it appears to other people, so please tell me if you think I should have just spelled the word out instead of doing what I did... if I should change the word altogether, etc. Really hoping to find out how other people see it, if it makes the word flow, or if I'm obviously just trying to get away with using a word that has 2 too many syllables in it.