The Lord's Prayer...

[NobodyNothing]

I've met a lot of people who were neither subtle nor complex. Maybe someone like that created the world. So human all too human, anthropomorphic isn't a concept considered.

I don't know, the more I read and understand of science, what we have learned about this physical universe we dwell in, the more and more subtle and complex of a creation it is to me.  I mean, quantum physics.  Say no more.

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if it's a sonnet it needs the rhyme and meter working on a bit better.
in genral it felt too generic and because of this also felt weaker than i would expect.

while all the right words and phrases are there, there only there as far as the words are there. they give me little but a forced monologue.

while i say the right words and phrase have been used, there's nothing in the poem that speaks top me the reader.  the title makes the poem religious not matter what is stated in the poem. i wanted to like it more but struggled to connect with it.

...part one.


                OUR FATHER

                          I

Time's evoking memory…once…there at last,
The substance and the movement of a dream
Born of forlorn space, ensuing to contrast
One sentimental moment to redeem

Of a father…enthralled in ecstasy
Beholding but the beauty of the gift,
Itself…only distinct in recognition
Of this relation:  responding harmonies.

Free…beyond the obscuring condition,
Unending image, wherewithal of myth,
Nature…awe inspiring composition,
Aesthetically unerring labyrinth...

This…the sweetest sorrow…could never belie
The creation in the remembrance of why.

Lol.  I wrote that years ago, along with the other three parts.  I don't write poetry anymore.  Of course it sucks.  It's me.  I was just thinking about some of the things I was thinking about those years ago when I wrote it.