Midnight drive

[isabelhershko]

Tires rolling down a strip of asphalt,
The car gently parts the darkness,
And I, insulated, stare blankly out
Of tinted windows to the stark night.

The sky is empty, but some distance away
City lights flicker as they swallow up stars.
"Look upon these, ye mighty, and be dismayed*
Oh gods, we need no titans to bring us these flames."**

I mutter vacantly. The car clutters softly
Away on its trek upon some track of tar
That mars a land where perhaps some lofty
Vagrant once trod to gaze up, alone, at the stars.

*Ozymandias by Shelly
**Myth of Prometheus

I think the imagery here is strong. You've taken an experience poetic in nature and expressed it in a way that didn't feel dated or overused. I do think that while there is definitely great language here, I would love more specificity. Maybe just by giving specific locations "Away on its trek upon some track of tar"...throwing in a destination there might add something concrete to the poem. I think there are definitely areas that could be tightened and some sentences that are made to be a bit more economic. I love L2 but I think even saying "the car parts the darkness" make it feel more compact while still using intriguing language. I think L6 feels a little cliche. Something about city lights feels out of place here where you've done such a great job avoiding that sensation. I love the use of alliteration L10. Overall, very nice job!