A Binding Love

[ChristopherSea]

Hi Tom, long time no see!

It’s a darkling tale and you have created a lot of atmosphere herein.
I have some thoughts for your next edit.

I would suggest replacing ‘; he’ with something else. A simple ‘and’ could work,
just to delay the reveal of this beast until we reach ‘The man.’

You have some extra spaces throughout, specifically between ‘holds  the,’
‘on  dull’ and ‘your  lustful’ unless they were intentional.

I am stumbling a bit on line 2 of stanza 2. First, 'in guilt' sounds off.
It could be me, but what about 'with guilt.' Second, if you rhyme with face
it might fare better. For example: ‘upon my face (whilst in your base and lustful throws)’

I want that ‘piss-filled’ to be ‘cum-stained’ to be more inline with the sexual deviance.

In your closing line, a comma after ‘binds me’ seems to be called for to create
some pause and tension. Also, ‘think’ seems a bit weak in the close, something like,
‘…free to dream/deem/muse...’ may be more poignant.

See what you think. Cheers, my mentor./Chris