Sitting Shiva

[Cousin Kil]

Hey Cousin. Your use (or not) of punctuation and uppercase letters is a distraction. It almost seems too chaotic to be unintentional. In my limited experience, the more often a reader has to go back a line or two to clarify their understanding, the less likely it is they will ever be bothered to get to the end. I do enjoy the feel of disjointedness in the poem, but for now it is weighed down by the punctuation, not accentuated by it. Your other option of course is to use no punctuation or caps at all. Would have read stronger to me with none.
Thanks for sharing and good luck with it.
Paul

Hey Paul,

To be honest, I wrote this poem a while ago and just decided to throw it up here. I don't remember exactly why I made the choices on punctuation and capitalization, but I understand how it could trip up it's reception.
Made the appropriate changes for a proper read.
Would love if you gave it a second glance and let me know what you think of the material itself. This is one of the poems I'm more fond of, so I'm eager to get as much feedback as I can.

Best,
CK