Crumbs revision 1

[Todd]

Revision

My childhood lies behind me
in this trail of torn bread.

I always ate enough
to remain hungry,
my stomach empty:

a waning moon
behind the branches
of this darkling forest.

Even when I saw food on her table,
I kept gnawing on the shingle,
a greedy little mouse, little mouse.


I still carry the finger bone
that I pressed into her hand
each night, after licking the plates.

Hunger crossed the threshold
and remained in me, even as her fat
melted in the oven. I had come back
older than my parents.

Unlike the girl in the fairy tale,
gems did not fall from my mouth
as one would pluck ripe cherries.

I chewed my words until they broke my teeth,
and lay heavy in my stomach
like forest stones.
I no longer need a path back:
I never left that cottage.

~~~


Original


My childhood lay behind me
in this trail of torn bread
I could no longer retrace.
 
We always ate enough
to remain hungry, our stomachs
waning like the sliver of moon
that sparkled through the branches
of this darkling forest.
 
Even when I saw the food
on her table, I kept gnawing
on the shingle like
a little mouse, little mouse.
 
I still carry the finger bone
I once pressed into her hand
each night, while licking the plates clean.
 
The hunger had crossed the threshold with me,
and remained even 
as her fat melted in the oven.
 
We came back older than our parents
with gems that shone like in the fairy tale
of the girl who had them fall from her mouth
like so many ripe cherries.
 
I chewed my words until they broke
my teeth, and laid heavy in my stomach
like forest stones.
I no longer needed a path back
for I never left that cottage.