Southerly

[Mark A Becker]

Hello tomoffing-

I very much like the imagery you create here, and the stinging twist at the end.

One suggestion I have is to lose a couple of the words at the end.  You'll see the ones that I struck-through.

I've pondered "gusted" a few times, and have a bit of trouble with it:  it's probably because "cold snap gusted".  A cold snap doesn't gust, the wind does.  Maybe just a minor thing (but I trip on it every time I read this piece).

All-in-all-- really good one!  
...Mark



Southerly

I remember it keenly;
the cut of a cold snap  the gusts of a cold snap
gusted from an emptiness cutting through the emptiness
few visit and none endure that few visit and none endure.
Pure edge and hardness
whet to sting fiercely
as the isolation
that formed it,
and bristling.
having been Tempted north
by warmth.

"Just go", she snapped,

closing the door.