Water Colour

[TheOnlyRedSmurf]

We watched the sunset bleed above the lake.
You painted its double in the water;
your strokes somehow soft ;here I see the line broken to give it more impact, can't explain why
softer than the touch of your lips.
<<------------------------------------------ Not sure if something is missing here? you left a gap,
<<-------------------------------------------it needs a line to tie the two stanzas together just a few words
When you were done, your cheeks were redder than the sky; perhaps "we" so you kissed and red faced etc
I laughed, and followed you into the lake.

I'm not sure how you wanted to paint this picture, water colours tend to be a little vague sometimes, i'm guessing this is what you were going for but it hasn't quite worked. maybe some more detail using soft words?