Haibun for the Morning

[Magpie]

Clutching a half empty bowl of cereal she unintentionally pirouettes at the bottom of the stairs, sways like a baby giraffe then gathers her composure to look down the length of the passageway before heading towards me. Looking like a tumble dried flamingo in her pink fluffy dressing gown she tentatively negotiates the distance between us till it is no more then turns and with the grace of a pregnant elephant collapses into the seat next to me. Without so much as the slightest of greetings she gazes at the ceiling then recommences our one sided conversation from yesterday. A night's consumption of alcohol had not only caused the stench that was now her noxious invasive breath but had also seemingly affected her memory as she added nothing new to her rhetoric that I was once again forced to listen to. 'The garage is a mess, the garden is messier, airing cupboards would be called home brewing cupboards if that was their true purpose, a woman has needs and they need batteries.' Embarrassed, I shuffled uncomfortably in my seat and sighed louder than I would have liked, which in turn caused her to abruptly spin round and hurl an inquisitive stare at me. The sudden movement also enabled her right breast to be released from its pink prison and it lurched forward and bounced vigorously as if nodding in agreement with its owner as to who was guilty of daring to sigh. Unable to take anymore I stood up and rang the bell for mercy whilst heading for the door.


rush hour madness
stuck with mrs. jones again
the bus to work