Stiff Drink

[billy]

it's too ambiguous to easily say what it's about being shot perhaps, chemical warfare? this is small enough to go in short form poetry. as it stand i get little from the poem and in parts it doesn't give anything either;

without
feeling

is this a death throw?

kismet
hardy

works without feeling in two lines doesn't

Stiff Drink

An outburst of outrageous red blisters why are the blisters outrageous, what angered them? a suggestion would be; an outrage of blisters
the ceiling. White knuckled hand for me this line doesn't work well enough to use the enjambment as it is
clutching hot steel
without
feeling.


… mb