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Their Thoughts
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06-18-2015, 11:33 PM
I really enjoy the idea you have here. However, being an imagery junkie, I wish it had more. You repeat several words like "past", "speak", and "they", I would tweak those a bit. In such a short piece, the repetition of those just make it feel bland.
"Bees do have a smell, you know, and if they don't they should, for their feet are dusted with spices from a million flowers." -Bradbury
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| Messages In This Thread |
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Their Thoughts - by Mr. Creosote - 06-18-2015, 11:04 PM
RE: Their Thoughts - by FindingJune - 06-18-2015, 11:33 PM
RE: Their Thoughts - by Magpie - 06-18-2015, 11:46 PM
RE: Their Thoughts - by hopefularahant - 06-19-2015, 10:51 AM
RE: Their Thoughts - by nightKnight - 06-29-2015, 08:25 AM
RE: Their Thoughts - by jams01752 - 07-04-2015, 01:31 AM
RE: Their Thoughts - by Vastile - 07-09-2015, 06:03 PM
RE: Their Thoughts - by TheOnlyRedSmurf - 07-09-2015, 08:34 PM
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