Night Terrors (finished)

[Animal Riots Activist]

Night Terrors

The air is always flat this time of night, --I think this line also falls a bit flat, perhaps intentionally so? There's a matter of fact feeling to it you wouldn't expect out of the first line of a poem called night terrors.
flat and cold and quiet, like the lake outside
in wintertime. My breathing, I slow down:
I don't want to break the ice.

When I go to bed, I never shut my light,
a sun lamp. Why does no one let me walk outside? --a sun lamp throws me off. I would say omit it.
There, the twisted trunks of oak never shift,
unlike the shadows of my bed. --the 'of' here is poignant, the contorting shadows from your bed haunt you, which is much better than shadows in your bed.
--I like the contrast/wordplay with unlike v like
Like the shadows of my bed, the wilderness at night
is home to creatures fanged and clawed; but outside,
the horrors are familiar, real and steady
in their motives, while my bed-sheets
shelter only water.

I've broken through the ice before. I remember light, --good to see the ice making a comeback here. I might even take it a step further, but it's interesting that your night terrors seem not to be dreaming of frightful things but instead are being afraid of dreaming. really nice twist
cold moonlight, crashing through the winter ice outside,
filling my lungs, choking me, washing away my steady,
never failing faith. Then, I was pulled up
by the rooster's crow. --really nice ending. I knew the plunge had to come somewhere in here.

I'm not quite sure how helpful that is, but it seems like you've got a pretty polished poem here, really nice work!