05-23-2015, 03:43 PM
milo, I can't work out whether I've read this before or if it just rather perfectly expresses what I've been thinking. The mallet must be the tool of choice -- smaller, more sophisticated tools are good for nothing but cosmesis.
The "whose hand" line is to my ear missing a beat -- I want it to read "whose hand has formed" but perhaps you're reading it differently. Similarly, the last line to me seems a bit off and I'd probably go with "or taste the dust of clay upon my teeth"... but then I'm always wanting things to be longer...
The "whose hand" line is to my ear missing a beat -- I want it to read "whose hand has formed" but perhaps you're reading it differently. Similarly, the last line to me seems a bit off and I'd probably go with "or taste the dust of clay upon my teeth"... but then I'm always wanting things to be longer...
It could be worse