A Block The Strongest Man Couldn't Budge
#4
Quote:"A Block The Strongest Man Couldn't Budge

I sat up late, irate at night.
A spark I thought would once ignite,
my mind, a match, I threw away.
I could not think of what to write.

So I sat in the dark with a page in my mitt.
I’d embark with my thoughts to a land far away.
I would fight, there’s no way that my mind would submit,
so I clutched on my pen until night turned to day.

The words would not escape my lips,
the words could not escape my wrist."

I really like the alliteration with the third line(the m's).
However some of the rhyming seems forced, especially with words like "ignite", and "mitt". Some phrases are also a little cliche like "thoughts to a land far away", and "Words could not escape my lips".

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Messages In This Thread
RE: A Block The Strongest Man Couldn't Budge - by MrTurnipHead - 04-25-2015, 01:30 AM
RE: A Block The Strongest Man Couldn't Budge - by Psyve - 04-26-2015, 03:51 AM
RE: A Block The Strongest Man Couldn't Budge - by thebrokeanarchist - 05-01-2015, 12:01 PM



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