Deathstalker-Edit 1

[onepapa]

There's a big debate raging on the site right now about footnotes or not.  You can find several threads where people are debating furiously about it.  I personally am not sure about preamble explanations...it always tends to distract from the poem itself.  I think it's possible to just name the poem Deathstalker (aka Leiurus Quinquestriatus) and leave it to people to explore...not sure, that's what the debate's all about.


Up to you, really...I think this is a wonderful in its simplicity and certainly makes one feel isolated, hunted down, if you will.

But since this in serious, we will divulge into the depths of it all, hold on.



Nothing moves

in my spotting scope; --that way the semicolon would be correct, even though I'm not big on use of semi colons when a period would do. Personal opinion is all>
field of fire clear
two thousand yards.

Blue Afghan skies
watch Khyber's ancient pass
and empty hills.

Acrid wind stirs my ghille bush, 
calescent air shimmers,
three hundred win mag
cool against my cheek.

Home's a smoky memory,
blurred by blood and terror.
Survival is all I ask.

A scorpion scuttles
across my shooting pad,
stinger poised,
hurrying to a hiding place.

Movement.
Insurgents debouch the defile.
>>I would leave a space here if I was me. <<

Hunters hunting me.


Good luck with the revision, i'm wondering where this one will go...

mel.

mel,

Thanks for the thoughtful comments. ghille was my stupid typo (no excuses accepted) for ghillie which is the camouflage gear worn by the sniper. I will use your input in the edit and appreciate the time you put into commenting.

onepapa