On my initial read, the poem was bland (sorry!) and followed the usual cliches that are present within other sources of poetry. On a scale of one-ten I would give this poem a six for following a general structure and rhyme scheme, but garners little interest towards the audience. The rhyme scheme that you place adds little source of interest for the audience, and seriously please do not rhyme the word "you" with itself; it feels unprofessional. The structure looks interesting, but adds no real "thing" to the presentation and read of your poem. You use occasional sexual terms in different manners like "thrust deep inside your mind" and "this journey hard and long", but this is just childish and overused in today's media. Once again good job, but there are a few problems that need to be fixed to improve the quality of this poem to good to publishable. 