02-19-2015, 10:58 PM
(02-19-2015, 10:11 AM)mongolfiere Wrote: I stay strong for you;I was a little thrown by every line being started by a capital as well, I wasn't sure if it was on purpose or to start a new sentence and you just forgot the periods.
Fit perfectly into your foundations,
Yet you see right through me.
I block out the rain for you;
Keep you dry for
Fear of your Perfect washing away, (of your Perfect? Is there a word missing? Maybe perfection should be there or something like it)
Yet you see right through me.
I shut off the buzzing of the world for you;
Keep the violent verbal bashing of the
Unworthy vermin at your door on mute
For fear of your heart fading to black
And withering to nothingness,
Yet you see right through me.
I let the light poor in on you,
Drenching your body in gold and
Illuminating every feature of
Your beautiful existence,
Yet you see right through me.
I brew the storm that sends me
Bursting into your room.
I lunge at you, reaching out for any
Glimpse of hope for us.
I search your face for any sliver of love.
I lay in pieces at your feet.
Do you see me now?
I love the verbiage in verse four!