02-12-2015, 01:54 PM
Thank you for taking the time to offer suggestions. I've always been a "rule" breaker. 
I do like your rewrite, but I want it known that not only did this poor, lovesick thief, loose his/her girl/guy, if that wasn't bad enough, his neighbor won't even talk to him anymore. lol. You nailed me too by the way, I am the worst about editing. I tend to get wordy, I like to think of myself as more of a free style artist, than a poet. But I am here to learn and improve. Thanks again.
I do like your rewrite, but I want it known that not only did this poor, lovesick thief, loose his/her girl/guy, if that wasn't bad enough, his neighbor won't even talk to him anymore. lol. You nailed me too by the way, I am the worst about editing. I tend to get wordy, I like to think of myself as more of a free style artist, than a poet. But I am here to learn and improve. Thanks again.