Like Sunlight

[just mercedes]

Like sunlight, she dances upon the tiled floors Why the word inversion?
Her silvery shoes twinkle from the right angle 'the right angle' is part of her shoes?
Her dress ripples in tempoed twirls
Like raindrops, her grass-green eyes form trickling pools Again, why inverted? 'grass-green' is cliched. If her eyes formed pools like raindrops do there would need to be more than two of them.

Her smiling cheeks bend tears at the right angle this doesn't mean anything to me.
Her teeth reflect in glittering jewels where did the 'glittering jewels' come from, to reflect her teeth?
Like wind, she seems to speak the coldest at dawn By now I'm tired of the repetition and inversion. Some anaphora just don't work.
Her shifting judgement sways the leaves
Her words rise quickly and she is gone
-BW BRINE

Hi BW - I admire the way you've tried to capture an elusive person by description, but I feel you need to work harder at this. If you meant to show that the girl who attracted you was not what she seemed to be, the tense feels wrong. This is in my opinion anyway.