01-29-2015, 09:01 AM
I like the mood set in this poem, but it's a little confusing who the speaker is directing his/her description towards, especially since it starts off with "You would have loved my older brother." It would be clarifying to know more about who is on the other end. I really like the comparison you make between the different perceptions the speaker has of the older brother's bike as time goes by. Did the brother pass away, by chance? "Would have loved" makes it sound like it would be impossible for the audience to meet this brother/giant... just an observation.