Has it

Has it

hestaredattheskyasiftoaskwhy
Unregistered

01-23-2015, 10:59 PM

Your style is confusing and your rhyming juvenile. Candy/randy part made me wince. The only suggestion I feel right in making is to tear it down and start over. It seems like you were trying to make words rhyme, but not really trying to say anything. Is this a rap or something?

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Messages In This Thread

Has it - by somnium - 01-11-2015, 07:59 PM

RE: Has it - by hestaredattheskyasiftoaskwhy - 01-23-2015, 10:59 PM

RE: Has it - by bena - 01-24-2015, 06:12 AM

RE: Has it - by Erthona - 01-24-2015, 07:29 AM

RE: Has it - by tomcrocus - 01-24-2015, 06:01 PM

RE: Has it - by Rustymetal - 01-29-2015, 09:26 AM

RE: Has it - by Nathan Sage - 02-04-2015, 12:43 AM

RE: Has it - by fromcancertocapricorn - 02-12-2015, 06:51 AM

RE: Has it - by Norimeknowreason - 02-12-2015, 12:26 PM

RE: Has it - by Mitul Yadav - 02-13-2015, 03:59 AM

RE: Has it - by starsman - 02-14-2015, 12:58 AM

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