The Panther Pisses in the Rill

[ellajam]

The Panther Pisses In The Rill

Wild Clover bloom upon the hill,
The Panther pisses in the rill.
The tawny waters dark and serene
Are swept onward to another scene.



Fin

Kubla Khan,

Ah, I have never seen a poem write another poem before, unless you are a son of a barbarian and then your name would be spelled wrong. Nope, definitely a poem. Evidently you have been reading poems of the Romantics. "Rill" was one of their favorite words. "Rill" becoming more archaic every day. Used either as affectation or in imitation of the Romantics, neither probably a good reason for its usage. Really the only thing you are missing is the invocation of the muse.

Poems are legitimately center justified for only concrete or shape poems. The only other use it has is in poor rhyming poetry bound in a fancy book to rest on old ladies' (who know nothing about poetry) coffee tables...well, and Hallmark cards which are really more rhyme than poem.

Oooh, the fancy French film ending "fin". Please never use that again as this is neither a film or a Mexican soap opera. It does act as the last line rejoinder in Romantic poetry, but this poem hardly warrants that.  

Sorry I thought this was in the "Newly Registered Forum," I didn't see it was in the "fun forum". Please disregard the above.

Welcome to the site,


Dale

I think you missed the whole boat, buddy. How could you interpret that poem as anything other than frivolousity? The "Fin" was introduced to further compound the absurdity, as "rill" itself was meant to convey the same imports. Can you comprehend levity?
If you can, indeed, comprehend levity, then my supposition is you felt dwindled when peering upon the genius which is "The Panther Pisses In The Rill"
And was briefly overtaken by a wild manic urge to desecrate something beautiful.
That too was levity, I hope you caught it that time.

---

Though, speaking of Kubla Khan, the short poem on your profile reminds me eerily of KK's ending lines.

Dale can critique anything.  

Wild Clover bloom upon the hill,
The Panther pisses in the rill.
The tawny waters dark and still
Around the bend will beer steins fill.

Fixed the meter a bit and added a little inversion for good measure.