The Other Side

[heslopian]

This path eclipsed from light and life I find

Relates to pages once viewed under a bind

My only option to dive into darkness

To be judged by those who think of me less "Less" than what? Or do they just not think of your narrator much?

The choices of past life were none but mine

So brand me a tragedy and bury divine "Divine" doesn't seem to jive with the rest of the line, and so feels tacked on to make a rhyme, in my opinion.

March me to my endless despair

For I have lived a life of a debonair I think "debonair" is more of an adjective than a noun.

This is me realizing what Dante wrote about in the Inferno turns out to exist. To be on a path that goes dark and the only way to go is the darkness where the demons of hell judge based on sins committed. The result being to suffer for eternity, but without regret due to living a life carved by me. - The information here should, I think, be expressed in the poem itself. Perhaps another verse or two?

The poem could be great, in my opinion, if you knuckled down and made it a longer narrative piece about you reading the Inferno and then responding to it. Maybe only three verses or so, but it would be so much better. As it is, it's kind of generic and forgettable. That's just my thoughts, though