10-13-2014, 07:23 PM
Owl,
Just a quick couple things you might enjoy considering. And I think once you look into them, you might end up w some more aggressive crit.
1. Is it possible to ID the speaker
--If the kitchen is a soup kitchen?
--if the kitchen is not the place where the power is out?
2. Is it possible to identify the "lost love" or the "that way"?
--if the mountain is a treacherous place?
--if the mountain is Olympus or Fuji or Sinai or Nebo?
Is it possible for the speaker to be God? Satan? The reader? Zeus?
A ghost?
Just a quick couple things you might enjoy considering. And I think once you look into them, you might end up w some more aggressive crit.
1. Is it possible to ID the speaker
--If the kitchen is a soup kitchen?
--if the kitchen is not the place where the power is out?
2. Is it possible to identify the "lost love" or the "that way"?
--if the mountain is a treacherous place?
--if the mountain is Olympus or Fuji or Sinai or Nebo?
Is it possible for the speaker to be God? Satan? The reader? Zeus?
A ghost?
A yak is normal.