Motif

[71degrees]

edit #1/thank you brandontoh and tomoffing

i meant literally rubber trees and when there are a number of them grown close to the compound walls they tend to make cracks, that's what i have seen in some places. compound wall is boundary wall that protects one's property. i am still undecided about the punctuation, to have it or not have it. and it is tabooed. i thought it works well here instead of tattooed. the rubber tree sap trickles down and it becomes crusted. that is what i tried to convey.

rubber trees
threaten to crack
my compound walls
broken from reverie
there is impermanence
on all sides

breathing in harmony
dawn is broken
by the swish of silk
leaves rustle
rendition by birds
in bass and treble

lying limp after
last night's lovemaking
pouring rain
pounding the roof
washing down the glass panes
insignia of your stubble
tabooed on my skin

thin cuts
i watch the
liquid ooze out
trickling down
crusted and hardened

Likes: Great title. Great line breaks. Last two stanzas. No punctuation. Dislikes: No capitals. Line breaks. No punctuation. I applaud your attempt to "experiment"...would think that's what a forum should be for. But even experiments have a purpose. What's yours? You need capitals to help me navigate your stop/start thoughts/images. I don't need end marks. I don't want end marks. They often get in the way of effect by tricking a reader into thinking he/she is reading prose. Capital letters, on the other hand, at least give readers a push in the right direction. Good writing will take care of the rest. Carry on. Love the rubber tree image used through out. Enjoyed reading this. A bunch.