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Elevator Music
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10-07-2014, 07:43 AM
You broke my heart in six lines. "Burlap silence" is really lovely. I don't know if you have to state that it's about a man and woman, though. If you were to take that line out, it's still going to feel like a missed opportunity, but as a reader I would rather be left wondering what it was than know explicitly.
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Elevator Music - by Wjames - 09-23-2014, 02:47 AM
RE: Elevator Music - by Tiger the Lion - 09-23-2014, 09:16 AM
RE: Elevator Music - by JPB - 09-24-2014, 08:37 AM
RE: Elevator Music - by Wjames - 09-25-2014, 07:44 AM
RE: Elevator Music - by 71degrees - 09-25-2014, 11:27 AM
RE: Elevator Music - by StanleyZ - 09-25-2014, 01:09 PM
RE: Elevator Music - by TheOnlyRedSmurf - 09-25-2014, 04:09 PM
RE: Elevator Music - by brandontoh - 09-25-2014, 06:00 PM
RE: Elevator Music - by billy - 09-25-2014, 06:18 PM
RE: Elevator Music - by Wjames - 09-27-2014, 08:44 AM
RE: Elevator Music - by BenjaminShaw - 09-29-2014, 10:45 AM
RE: Elevator Music - by Mwaba don - 10-02-2014, 10:18 PM
RE: Elevator Music - by justcloudy - 10-05-2014, 06:16 AM
RE: Elevator Music - by b.abraham - 10-07-2014, 07:43 AM
RE: Elevator Music - by t.arcadius - 10-07-2014, 09:03 AM
RE: Elevator Music - by Kostallo - 10-08-2014, 06:22 AM
RE: Elevator Music - by Wjames - 10-13-2014, 11:26 AM
RE: Elevator Music - by RSaba - 10-18-2014, 02:09 AM
RE: Elevator Music - by vanilla - 10-19-2014, 11:49 AM
RE: Elevator Music - by Wjames - 10-20-2014, 12:00 PM
RE: Elevator Music - by phacade - 10-21-2014, 03:22 AM
RE: Elevator Music - by J.M.Byrnes - 10-25-2014, 04:05 AM
RE: Elevator Music - by Wjames - 10-25-2014, 04:22 AM
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