If Money Were a Man

[cidermaid]

Hi rowens why are you only posting in newbie land recntly?
Not sure what level of comments you ar looking for...offered a few thoughts below.
Overall quite likd this one but think it lacks integrity towards th end with the initial statement...seems to contradict itself.

If Money Were a Man



If money were a man I'd murder him in cold blood:

but I'd feel bad about it,

I'd go to church and confess it,

in front of the whole congregation;   I would consider swapping these lines round, i think it reads better / makes more sense  My read shown
not being a catholic,

and I wouldn't accept anyone's forgiveness.  don't think the and is needed.



I wouldn't go to prison.

I wouldn't let them take me alive;

I wouldn't kill for my right to be free,

but I wouldn't let them take me alive.  too many wouldn'ts in this stanza.




I wouldn't die for it either,  I've lost track of if the "it " is the right to bee free or the act of killing the money man.   this stanza is confusing.

there would be nothing they could do to me,

I wouldn't harm a soul:



If you've ever seen Death Wish,

the way he felt about those men that raped and killed his wife and daughter:

That's the way I feel about money.   This is great.  love these three lines.



If only there was a man I hated as much.  good close.