green is the color of silence

[StanleyZ]

Thank you. Yes, even I think I love the word cumulus. I used it intentionally to capture a scene which I see everyday. But obviously it doesn't seem to work well. I'll see what I can do there. I like the suggestion of using horizon or vista instead of backyard so the images remain far.

I think cumulus is a fitting word for this poem, but you could really play with it. Don't just spit it out in the second line, after all I already stated that this poem would benefit from zooming out. How great would it be to throw cumulus in one of the latter lines? Think about it, the first thing that comes to mind when you think of cumulus is an accumulation of clouds. Use every effect of the word to emphasize the way you are using it. Let those clouds dominate the line with such a stand out word. Don't use it to seem like you've done this before. Use it like it's a fire hose the reader has to straddle within their own mind. Make it pop, but give it a reason to pop, that the reader will come back to after a few reads, and truly appreciate and enjoy.