Maturing

[Brownlie]

Maturing


I fell in love today,
and like my poet friends advised:
I put my pen away. -- This is an interesting idea for a poem.


We can talk about it later.
It's too big to wrap in this paper -- I would get rid of "this" as it interrupts the rhythm.  You have two trochaic lines that rhyme. The resulting chanting sound is then interrupted by a terse last line which stops the reader abruptly. Something you may want to play with.
anyway.

pb 9-27