Diana

[danny_]

I paint her in summer sun, i like the warm opening. if you don't want to say summer and then August later, just as a small point, you could say simply 'in the sun' or somesuch, without losing anything
the midday breeze caressing
Diana’s proud breasts,
warm fingers of August heat
tracing circles over taut flesh. simple, nice strophe.

Brushstrokes mimic alabaster skin the word mimic i understand as i was an interior home painter for many years and we did use that word for paint sometimes, but here it trips me because brushstrokes in themselves don't really mimic skin, since it would more likely be the absence of visible strokes in order to get a good skin texture. that's how it flashed on me, anyway
dimpled with shades of barest pink;
her cheeks flush, fires stoked within—
she is aroused, and I am nervous. i like this these lines. it's straightforward which works for me. otherwise you might consider showing how you are nervous. you keep pausing to sip from a condensating glass of icewater or something

The model’s eyes narrow in mischief.
I ask her not to smile

but she does anyway. i like the line break, very nice ending.

overall i like it, and also feel it could take us even closer to this warm summer moment if you went a little deeper with it. that's kinda vague but, well it tickles my imagination and think it could even be painted out a little more with the connection between the painter and model and the feelings going on as expressed by their actions.

that's my honest bit there. thank you for sharing.