08-29-2014, 06:31 PM
awesome poem. wouldn't change much. wondering just what you thought needed serious workshopping? bringing that polished sports car in here acting like it needs to be rebuilt is kinda insulting!
just playing around.
i like your last two lines unchanged. "plus" because it's like the cream on the cake. plus jesus himself! i can hear that. keep all that, it really works.
just playing around.
i like your last two lines unchanged. "plus" because it's like the cream on the cake. plus jesus himself! i can hear that. keep all that, it really works.
"The best way out is always through."-Robert Frost
dwcapture.com
dwcapture.com

