Plots

[escher]

thanks for you feedback i see what you mean with the word meanwhile.... i did want to paint the image that these two patches of grass were simultaneously there... or in the present, so to speak, and the ironic contrast between them. i guess poignantly or incongruously is what i directly mean... but is that taking away from the experience - being so straight forward? interested to know what anyone thinks?

Also thanks for the tip on refuge... i guess that means more like shelter or safety... i mean to say something like rest

Im trying to show the contrast between the ordered and social life where everyone is too busy/in their head, to sit and enjoy the little patch of nature we have in urban settings. I thought, how ironic that there is a little patch of nature somewhere (graveyard) that speaks of a life once lived... only once and maybe lived?. sit and enjoy the grass don't wait till your dead to rest in peace... etc

Does that message come across? its hard to tell if the meaning is clearly portrayed when you already know the meaning behind it...